“Why do I destroy everything I love?”
“A being of pure light came down from the sky, hacked my Twitter, and sent a bunch of quasi-erotic messages to my wife’s sister. One of the most amazing things I’ve ever seen.”
“Nemo?”
Elaine weighs an evening chatting with friends versus an evening alone with her pound of brie.
“This is the best birthday ever.”
“Would you mind writing an absence note for her school?”