Stacey: This is a pretty comprehensive list. “From sequoias to Stratocasters” could almost be Jerry Dunphy’s catchphrase if he were still alive and if people still watched local news with anchors who had catchphrases, although I don’t see my boyfriend Robert Redford anywhere here. Who better personifies California’s ruggedly handsome, though in places sunblasted, terrain than Santa Monica’s favorite son? (Better luck next time, Dave Navarro.) I guess a person can’t be a wonder. What else is missing, Gustavo?
Gustavo: Sorry, I’m stuck on the 110 North trying to go south—what are we talking about? I’m glad Mexicans made it onto the list with monarch butterflies, although those gorgeous bugs had better get their papers in order soon. But you know what’s a huge omission? The California Aqueduct, that water system that hydrates everything from crops to humans to power plants. But isn’t our ability to take major things for granted a California wonder as well?
Stacey: Yeah, agreed, it’s a hell of an aqueduct—hell of any kind of duct, really—but are we allowed to claim wonders that we didn’t invent? It would be very Roman of us to just seize it, which, come to think of it, is also very Californian of us. Whatever—I won’t tell the Minoans or whoever if you won’t. In any case, we did invent Chinatown, one of the best aqueduct movies ever. OK, maybe not you and me, but Robert Towne did, and he was born in Los Angeles.
Gustavo: Touché, but did Californians invent Mavericks, sequoias, and monarchs? (Or did Towne ever get $150,000 a week to do their uncredited punch-ups?) Oh, wait: Of course we did. God is a Golden Stater, after all. Everyone knows that Jesus attended UCLA back when in-state enrollment was free—and still looks the other way when In-N-Out quotes His favorite book on its cups.
This column appears in Issue 30 of Alta Journal.
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Stacey: In-N-Out! Another wonder! Sure, the fast-food hamburger is on the list (rightly), but don’t you agree that In-N-Out is a wonder all its own?
Gustavo: As the top search results for my name make clear, I’ve always maintained that In-N-Out is overrated. (Come at me on Instagram—I’m at @betovision.) Anyhoo, the list includes culture, nature, food…how do we feel that no politicians or political movements are on there? California has unleashed so many political earthquakes, liberal and conservative and whatever the Free Press is this news cycle, so I think there should’ve been a plug. Gavin Newsom’s teeth are as white as the peak of Mount Whitney, after all, and his hair is almost as windswept as El Capitan.
Stacey: Now we’re talking: Alta needs a special issue just on California’s contributions to hair. I see multiple covers: Farrah’s Feathers, the Rachel, the Sally Hershberger Shag…
Gustavo: Don’t forget Jerry Brown’s natural tonsure or Cher’s everything…and speaking of the pride of El Centro (herself a living wonder), what about Bob Mackie and California’s contribution to fashion? This list is sorely lacking in style, the sleek Catalina island fox notwithstanding.
Stacey: Three words: “The Juicy Jumpsuit.” And five more words: “We’re really sorry about those.” Four additional words: “And about Von Dutch.”
Gustavo: You know what redeems all those abominations? Levi’s, which isn’t on the list either! What would your boyfriend Bob Redford be without a pair of perfectly fitted Levi’s?
Stacey: Dead to me. Yeah, Levi’s are the one constant in my life. I’d canvass (denim?) to make them our state uniform. Vote Yes on Prop. 501!
Gustavo: So, to close things out, because I’m almost at my exit: Do you think this Seven Wonders of California Issue is a one-off, or are there so many wonders left out that we can do this every year to the point of parody, like those Super Lawyers inserts that make other magazines look so thick?
Stacey: If People can crown a new Sexiest Man Alive (an honor my beloved Redford has never received, despite Brad Pitt and Johnny Depp having gotten it twice) before all the previous recipients die, then there can certainly be multiple Wonders issues of Alta. Will wonders ever cease? We’ll see. Now put down your phone or you’ll miss the exit!
Gustavo: Sorry, I missed it and am now on Highway 395 south of Susanville. The view? Wonderful.•
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Stacey Grenrock Woods is a regular contributor to Esquire and a former correspondent for The Daily Show with Jon Stewart. She writes and consults on various TV shows, and has a recurring role as Tricia Thoon on Fox’s Arrested Development. Her first book is I, California.
Gustavo Arellano is the author of Orange County: A Personal History and Taco USA: How Mexican Food Conquered America. In 2025, Arellano was named a Pulitzer Prize finalist for his work as a columnist for the Los Angeles Times. He was formerly editor of OC Weekly, an alternative newspaper in Orange County, California, and penned the award-winning ¡Ask a Mexican!, a nationally syndicated column in which he answered any and all questions about America’s spiciest and largest minority. Arellano is the recipient of awards ranging from the Association of Alternative Newsweeklies Best Columnist to the Los Angeles Press Club President’s Award to an Impact Award from the National Hispanic Media Coalition, and he was recognized by the California Latino Legislative Caucus with a 2008 Spirit Award for his “exceptional vision, creativity, and work ethic.” Arellano is a lifelong resident of Orange County and is the proud son of two Mexican immigrants, one of whom came to this country in the trunk of a Chevy.
